Surrendering Enabling Habits

Surrendering Enabling Habits

by | Blog

Surrendering Enabling Habits

By Jane “Goldie” Winn

There is a difference between helping someone and enabling them. Helping can offer support, encouragement, and a hand when someone is struggling. Enabling, however, can sometimes keep a person stuck by protecting them from the natural consequences of their choices.

When Helping Becomes Enabling

Surrendering enabling habits can be difficult, especially when our intentions are good. We may step in because we love someone, feel responsible for them, or simply want to keep the peace.

The Desire to Make Everything Better

Sometimes we believe that if we just try harder, explain things differently, or rescue someone one more time, everything will finally change. But we cannot make another person change or make their choices for them.

Constantly fixing problems for others can leave us exhausted, frustrated, and emotionally drained.

Love Does Not Mean Fixing Everything

Loving someone doesn’t require us to solve every problem they face. Sometimes love means allowing another person to experience the consequences of their decisions.

Learning to Step Back

Stepping back doesn’t mean becoming uncaring. It means recognizing what belongs to us—and what belongs to someone else.

Healthy boundaries can feel uncomfortable at first. We may experience guilt, fear, or worry about what will happen when we stop stepping in.

But sometimes stepping back is exactly what allows another person to begin taking responsibility for their own life.

Surrendering the Need to Control

Surrender isn’t about giving up on someone. It is about releasing our belief that everything depends on us.

Choosing Peace Over Responsibility for Everyone

We can love people without carrying their burdens for them. We can offer encouragement without taking over. We can say, “I love you, but I cannot do this for you.”

That isn’t rejection. It can be an honest expression of love.

“Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee.” — Psalm 55:22 (KJV)

When we surrender enabling habits, we make room for healthier relationships, stronger boundaries, and greater peace within ourselves.

Sometimes surrender means trusting enough to let go—and allowing others the opportunity to stand on their own.

Here is a wonderful ebook to help you on your surrender journey:

The Healing Power of Surrender: A 30-Day Devotional Journey to Peace and Purpose by Jane “Goldie” Winn
You can download it today for just $9.99 and begin 30 days of transformation and lasting freedom. Click Here to buy The Healing Power of Surrender

 

Here for you,

Goldie

Surrender and PTSD Awareness: Finding Healing Through Letting Go

Surrender and PTSD Awareness: Finding Healing Through Letting Go

by | Blog

Surrender and PTSD Awareness Month: Finding Healing Through Letting Go

by Jane “Goldie” Winn, MSS

Scripture: 
Matthew 11:28
“Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

June is PTSD Awareness Month, a time dedicated to raising awareness about post-traumatic stress disorder and supporting those affected by trauma. PTSD can result from combat, abuse, loss, accidents, or other life-altering events. Its effects often extend far beyond the initial experience, impacting emotions, relationships, sleep, and daily life.

One often-overlooked aspect of healing is surrender. This is not surrendering in defeat, but surrendering the burden of carrying pain alone.

What Surrender Means in Recovery

For many people, trauma creates a need for control as a way to feel safe. Hypervigilance, anxiety, and emotional numbness can become survival mechanisms. While these responses may have served a purpose at one time, they can also become barriers to healing.

Surrender means acknowledging the pain instead of constantly fighting it. It is the willingness to say, “I cannot do this alone.” Rather than resisting every difficult emotion or trying to control every trigger, surrender opens the door to acceptance, support, and recovery.

The Power of Letting Go

Surrender does not erase trauma, but it changes how we respond to it. When we surrender:

  • We allow ourselves to process emotions in healthy ways.
  • We become more open to therapy, support groups, and trusted relationships.
  • We release the belief that we must heal on our own.
  • We learn to trust the healing process, even when progress feels slow.

Healing from PTSD is rarely a straight path. There are setbacks and difficult days, but surrender creates room for grace and growth.

Spiritual Surrender and Hope

For many, surrender also includes faith. Matthew 11:28 reminds us, “Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Placing our burdens in God’s hands can bring comfort, strength, and hope. Trauma may be part of your story, but it does not have to define your future.

Conclusion

PTSD Awareness Month reminds us that healing is possible. Surrender is not weakness—it is the courage to stop fighting alone and embrace support, restoration, and peace. Healing often begins with a simple but powerful step: letting go of what was never meant to be carried by yourself.

Here is a wonderful ebook to help you:

The Healing Power of Surrender: A 30-Day Devotional Journey to Peace and Purpose by Jane “Goldie” Winn
You can download it today for just $9.99 and begin 30 days of transformation and lasting freedom. Click Here to buy The Healing Power of Surrender

Here for you,

Goldie